The Perils of the Pen
I have been writing short stories for almost thirty years and have quite a collection. I have published them on story websites, I have published them in a book where I wove them together into a thematic storyline, I have even sent one off to a contest and had it made into a TV movie segment. The short story is my preferred form of writing because I have more than a little trouble keeping my concentration in the storytelling of an entire novel. I write every day to practice and to let out some of the creative energy which seems to accumulate within me.
Since I, like most writers, draw on my own experiences when I write (write what you know!), I am always confronted with choices of voice and perspective. Am I me? Am I me with a pseudonym? Am I describing someone else? Am I using his/her name or a pseudonym? Names are, for some reason, very important to my storytelling, so I am always looking for a good name for a character, whether it is really about me or about someone I know. This aspect of my writing has caused me to run into a problem or two along the way.
The first problem is the obvious one. If you write about a family member you are bound to be treading a fine line. I once wrote a great story about my nephew after he had come and stayed with me for a few weeks. He was at the critical stage in his development where he was finding his way and making lots of mistakes in the process. With no intended maliciousness, I wrote a story about him in a humorous vein. I was particularly proud of the story and the twist in its ending. I sent it out to my family members. Some commented back that they found it hilarious. His parents not so much. In fact, his father, a man I have known and respected for over forty years wrote me a two-page letter explaining why I did not understand his son and why my perspective was not valid. It was clear that I had offended him and that my humor was at the expense of his dear son. Whether I actually crossed a line or his father was simply too defensive on his son’s behalf is not the point. The point is that every author needs to consider carefully the impact of his words on others.
I recently wrote a blog post story about my children and I sent it to them for comment. I thought I was being very careful in my choice of words and in the sentiments I expressed while still getting my point across. In my defense, I would suggest that writing about close family members is perhaps most evocative of true human emotion and therefore may represent the truest and best writing one can do. All of my children know me by now and know that I am not a private person and that I always share more rather than less than what others might think is appropriate. In that case, my oldest son was fine with the accuracy of the story, but commented that he still didn’t understand why I needed to share these thoughts with the world, even if they were not offensive to him or his siblings.
I am guessing that the reason for that is that I just have this insatiable need to tell stories. Do I crave attention? Maybe somewhat, but I think not more than any other normal person. Are these important tales that need telling? Not at all. The world would go on as it has for millennia without my stories. There is no doubt about that, but the sum total of all the stories that every storyteller tells are a necessary element of life. “The unexamined life is not worth living”, said Socrates to his students. Stories help us all examine life and that is true for none more than the storyteller himself.
I also just published a story about a friend and prior colleague of mine. It was a complimentary article about his approach to life and the honesty and integrity under which he lived. When I do not hear back from someone about a story I write that involves them I usually figure either they have been delayed in reading it (my age bracket is often travelling somewhere or other) or I have somehow troubled them and they are seeking the words to tell me what they don’t like about what I have said. Sometime I am disappointed in myself for not being more aware and attuned to the perspective of others (I do pride myself in being self-aware, but no one’s perfect). And sometimes I am very much surprised at the objections being raised and it jostles my consciousness on a new level.
This friend said he was troubled by one aspect of the story. I sometimes add too much extraneous detail in my stories, but I tend to think of that as texture which adds richness to the tale. In this case I mentioned that this guy had sold his business for a handsome sum. He corrected me and said he had actually been fired and gotten a settlement based on the value of the business and as contractually due him. He was concerned that some of his ex-employees would read the story and get riled up that he had sold them out. I honestly had not thought of this. I knew he had gotten a bunch of money when he left his business behind. If I had known the details he now has filled me in on, I might have thought them too sensitive to mention anyway. I used a shorthand to give the big picture details….he had retired and he was quite comfortable and able to donate his time to charity now.
I pushed back ever so gently saying that I needed some poetic license to write within the confines of the short story format. That got me nowhere. I tried saying that I didn’t know, nor should I have shared the details of the transaction. That didn’t work. Then I tried to escape by saying it was only his first name and not his whole name. That was weak and he tagged me on that as well. Finally I had to just say that I would be more mindful of how people I write about might perceive my depictions…or else do a better job of disguising the personalities.
I am pretty sure I have to choose the later since I doubt I can get into everybody’s head the way I would need to. With any luck I can keep myself from poking my eye out with my pen.