Fiction/Humor Memoir

The Korean Clown Car

The Korean Clown Car

I’m sure it is not lost on any of us that the economies that seem to be doing the best across the world, other than the American economy, have been Germany, Japan and now Korea. In fairness, the first two were our enemies in WWII and the third was our ally (given that I am referring to South Korea or, technically, the Republican of Korea), but all three countries were the sites of extended warfare and basically in the trash can at the end of their respective conflagrations. It seems to have been the American way that we help our war partners and enemies alike to the point where they not only get back on their feet economically, but they actually end up prospering. What Japan was in the seventies and eighties as the electronics low-cost and high-quality producer has been taken over in the new Millennium by South Korea. In the world of televisions and other appliances, for the last twenty years, the market leader has been Samsung. For almost ten years, I have been a strong devotee of Samsung TVs, which I have owned with great experience. That was so much the case that when we moved our act out here to the hilltop and needed to upgrade our appliances (the TVs, which were already all Samsung, were all in perfectly good shape), we upgraded to Samsung wherever we could. We bought a pair of Samsung washer and dryer and would have also bought a Samsung dishwasher except that we the only one that fit was a different brand.

Right after moving here we started to have problems with our Samsung washer. We had several different repair crews out to work on the appliance and the fixes never seemed to hold. Something was always going wrong to the point where we decided to just replace the Samsung washer with a less expensive, less functionally-rich GE washer that has worked fine since then. We don’t miss the features that the Samsung had and we find ourselves just praying that the Samsung dryer keeps working. So far so good. When we recently had a problem with our Bosch dishwasher, the repairman said that he would recommend repairing the older Bosch because the newer ones were breaking all the time. He then went on to tell us that whatever we did, we should absolutely NOT buy a Samsung since they seemed to break all the time.

There are very few things more irritating than appliances that keep breaking down. Appliances are household utilities and when utilities are not functioning, the household routine gets disrupted and that is never a fun situation. There are no appliances in the house that we use more than the TVs. The good news is that TVs are now all solid-state and have virtually no moving parts. Washers, dryers and dishwashers are appliances that need to physically move things around and the electronics are just part of the equation. With TVs, it is all about electronics. When the members of the Geek Squad recently opened up my new 85” flat-screen Samsung TV, I was amazed to see how little there was inside. Other than the flat speakers and the actual front screen panel, all there is inside the thing is a one foot square integrated circuit board. I was surprised to see how little there was that could go wrong. I have grown up in the era of integrated circuits and transistors and with those things put together in clean room environments by people who look pretty damn professional and scientific with little booties on their feet and masks and hats covering them to keep the dust down, I am used to them never going bad. That’s pretty much the case. Being solid-state is a very solid state of play.

Well, this whole affair has come to a head over my South Korean build Samsung 85” Neo-QLED television, which I have now had for two months and have been trying to get fixed for 50 of those days. My primary reason for repair is a self-inflicted wound to them by Kim, who dropped some CHristmas decorations in it and gouged it in two places. The TV is still otherwise functional, but the gouges are noticeable and annoying. After seeking recompense under the Best Buy buyer protection plan, I realized that was a non-starter when the local store manager informed me that the NEVER replace items unless they have damaged them. I therefore sought and obtained a claim under my Platinum AMEx buyer protection plan. I got a $1,300 credit for repair and have been waiting those 50 days for them to repair the TV to no avail. They have now scheduled five appointments and twice come with a replacement panel which has either not worked properly or been the wrong part. Yesterday they brought a 75” panel instead of an 85”panel and failed to realize the mistake until I pointed it out. I have also noticed and spoken to the service reps every time they have come that for some reason, this TV has a problem with connectivity with Hulu, my main streaming provider. No other TV in the house has that problem, so it is fair to say it is a set-specific problem, not a WiFi or signal problem. No one has tried to address that and no one seems to have an answer for that. Yesterday, during the visit, the repairman said that if he were me he would have just returned the set weeks ago and gotten a new one. My discussion with the local store manager would seem to have made that approach less than effective.

So, while the repair crew left and ordered another repair panel, I called the Best Buy number and asked for the local store manager. Naturally, what I got was a customer service rep who quickly shunted me to their Geek Squad counterpart. I went through the same detailed explanation to her with the suggestion and revelation that since I had an AMEX credit, perhaps we could come to some mutually agreeable compromise to bring me an entirely new set since this had to be costing them money as well as frustrating me. Her response was to ask me if what I wanted was for them to pick up my old set and install a new one. I declared that to be the case, to which she proceeded to put in the procedure to do just that. I decided to go with it, recognizing that it might end up costing me a net $1,100, but figuring that it would be better to argue from the position of having a new TV in place. When she was done and confirmed the first available installation appointment three days hence, I simply asked how much this would cost me. She said it would be done for free. I’m not sure I believed her, but I accepted that. After she hung up, first I saw the appointment confirmation email come in and then I saw the receipt come in. The receipt says that they were giving me full credit for the old set and charging me for the new set for a net amount due of $0. There was not even a redelivery or restocking charge. In fact, I think I got the requisite bonus points on my membership account without a deletion of the old membership points.

The Korean Clown Car as interpreted by Best Buy and the Geek Squad seem to have spoken. All my best efforts to play by the rules and wasting my time and that of the Geek Squad repair team seems for naught. I guess I will believe it when I see it in two days, but I seem to be getting more than satisfaction on the whole affair. In fact, if they install a fully functioning new set and take the old damaged one and there is no point-of-installation attempt to extort me for more money, I will be $1,300 and some 500 bonus points ahead of the game and I will have a different dilemma. What will I do vis-a-vis American Express? I will save that for another day. I went on Google to see what the best 85” TVs are these days and of the top 10, one is a Korean LG, two are Japanese SONYs and the other seven are Korean Samsungs. So, the dogs bark and the Korean Clown Car rolls on into the night, ably assisted by Best Buy and Geek Squad.