Magic Sauce
Maybe its just me, but I have been hearing on TV, in the car on the radio (both Sirius and streaming) and even online, a seemingly endless set of pitches for natural and organic “medicines” for the easing of joint and muscle pain and other ailments of the aged. These advertisements are clearly directed to aging Baby Boomers. I read recently in the AARP monthly magazine that the U.S. retired population, defined as those who are 65 years old or older (which represents about 58 million people with another 15 million heading into that cohort in the next six years) have net worth that makes the cohort economically bigger than all countries on earth except for the U.S. and China. That sort of makes sense and what it really means is that we, the American retirement community, are a target market with which to be reckoned. That same AARP article listed all the ways that the American retirement community is changing the American scene altogether. What I am noticing most is that I am seeing more attention to physical and mental health. I’m seeing a lot of pickleball in commercials and while I suspect that has a lot to do with retired folks, there are lots of people of all ages playing the sport, so who knows if its about retirement or not. But there is no mistaking many of the products as targeted to us aging Boomers for the things that might be ailing us.
For some time there have been saturation ads about some sort of jellyfish-based pills called Prevagen. The ads feature some particular Baby Boomer who is intended to be more or less like us. They seem to want to pick someone who looks older but healthy a the same time. Someone who is no Jack LaLanne, but still looked healthy enough to be enjoying life. By the way, when you spend a moment thinking about Jack LaLanne, who died in 2011 at age 96 of pneumonia, you realize what a pioneer he was for our way of physical fitness. He single-handedly transformed the American way of life and outlook about fitness by doing things like practically inventing the health club, weight machines, TV exercise shows, the jumping jack, workout videos, resistance bands, aerobics, protein supplements, juicing, organic-based diets, protein bars, and, finally, exercise programs geared towards aging Americans. It is amazing to see all the trends he started that we still swear by these days, especially among those of us who are beginning to realize that our bodies are starting to wear out before we are completely done using them. But back to Prevagen, this is the non-prescription, non-FDA-approved supplement that these “real” people are touting as helpful with the problem of the mind going before the body breaks down.
Kim and I have after joked with one another as to which of us is going to choose to have his or her mind go first versus having our body go first. We vacillate in our respective directions based on what is ailing us at the moment and whatever corrective action we are each taking to avoid that particular path. We each have the benefit of having friends and family that are as much as fifteen years our seniors, so we are able to get previews of what life gets to be like when one or the other aspect of our being starts to fall apart. It’s really not clear which of those two options is better, which is why we sort of hope that our partnership will allow us to fill each other’s gaps as best we can by choosing alternate sides of the equation.
So, clearly Prevagen is targeted at those who are suffering some memory loss and who worry about going down the senility path. I have watched several people go down that path and while it looks like no fun, it seems to be a greater burden on those who are caring for you rather than you yourself. Nature seems to be kind enough to leave you out of the awareness cycle on that path and whether you are peeing into the umbrella stand at night (something that a person I knew used to do) or curled up in a fetal position for seven years (a rather severe case of Alzheimer’s disease that I saw), you are less affected by these problems and more or less oblivious to them. This path does not seem to be like Robert DeNiro in Awakening where he is like a caged panther prowling inside his cage, completely compos mentis but unable to connect his brain to his body. I have another friend who is in his mid-80s who calls up to review small private investments we share, except that he does so over and over, asking the exact same questions that he forgets that he has asked. When I spoke to his son (who is a skilled investment guy who used to work for me), he told me that you can take away an old guy’s car keys when he can no longer drive, but you really can’t take away an old guy’s cell phone when he can no longer responsibly use it. Perhaps the solution there is to make sure the old guy’s cell phone only has numbers stored in it that will mostly be for emergencies or to close family and friends who will be understanding of this debilitation.
On the physical ailment side of the equation, the focus seems to be on some combination of digestive dysfunction and joint/muscle breakdown. The supplements being sold aggressively for digestion are things like Balance of Nature, which again are non-prescription and non-FDA-approved. They market them in a green bottle for the veggie supplement and in a red bottle for the fruits supplement. The idea is that we all need to eat more fruits and vegetables than we probably do, so if we take these supplements we will be better off. They, like most of these supplements come in a recurring order sent directly to you and off you go. Whomever is of an age but has not already committed to hawking Prevagen, is signed up to hawk Balance of Nature. They particularly seem to like getting a nutritionist or a medical practitioner to tell you how much he or she relies on these supplements to keep them healthy and riding their bike and having fun in their older retired lifestyle. Once again, don’t you really want to be more like them and still not have to adhere to the rigors that some guru like Jack LaLanne might put you through that requires a blender and fresh produce?
The ads I have started to hear and see lately that most resonate with me are the ones specific to joint and muscle aches, something most of us (even probably those on the dementia path). Who among us aging Baby Boomers does not wake up with some aches and pains or have stiffness when we get up after prolonged sitting? If you exercise too much you are sore. If you exercise too little you are sore. Imagine that, it seems that moderation might be the best path. There are an endless array of these products in the non-prescription non-FDA-approved supplement category and salves/cream category and they all seem specifically geared to helping people who want to enjoy their PickleBall games more. There are even some that specifically target night leg cramps. How did they know I get those? Oh yeah, 40% of aging men get those.
I will admit to having some cannabis-based back back salve, but I only use that when I get really tweaked. But I have started a regime of something called AG-1, which, sure enough is a recurring order product (Kim technically has the subscription) that is basically a probiotic green drink that is made by just shaking it up in water. It seems easy enough and inoffensive enough to do every day and it actually seems to help regulate my digestion quite well, so I’m sticking to it. I mean, who likes pooping their pants too often, right? So, while I am a definite devotee of motion being the best lotion (and I am doing lots of motion these days, training twice a week, swimming laps four times a week, going to Stretch-U twice a week and gardening up a storm almost every day to some degree), I am not above trying and even regularly using some magic sauce to keep the aging demons at bay. And you know, if you buy the stuff by subscription and in bulk it really is much cheaper…if I remember correctly…