Edgy Ageism

Edgy Ageism

Week Two of the Grand Hibernian Tour is underway. What distinguished this week from last is that the participants are, for the most part, from my wife Kim’s side of the ledger. Siblings, friends from Wabash, Indiana (the ancestral spawning-ground of the Grogg Clan), Theater friends (Showboat, State Fair, Gypsy and Lennie’s Wild Mouse Ride) and a googly-eyed nephew and his beloved Ashley. My friends on this voyage, besides all the befriending I have done of the aforementioned over a dozen years of honoring the Goddess Kim, are a couple who live in Colorado, hail from England and Texas, work in New York and St. Andrews, Scotland and are already in shocked wonderment of the diversity of our gang. These are your usual, yet somehow unusual, gathering of friends and family that make such travels extra-special, so much is anticipated of the next week.

Last week the crowd was child and children oriented and the average age was 41 years (pretty amazing given the presence of half a dozen sixty-somethings in the mix). This week’s blend favors an average age closing dangerously in on the dreaded sixty years old. Of course, for much of the crowd, sixty doesn’t seem so old any more, what with it being the new forty by all popular accounts. Last week, there was hardly any need to discuss the modern world’s current obsession with Mr. Donald J. Trump and his family and advisory of “Idgits”, as the Irish would say. It was a foregone conclusion that everyone would just bluster themselves blue in a rage of immigration or Roe v. Wade hand-waving angst if his name was even mentioned. This week there is need for enlightened and open-minded discussion on the merits (I can personally think of none) and the extensive demerits of the man, the myth, the legend and the scourge of Liberal Democracy. So far, the only thing the right and left of our group has agreed is that China (pronounced “Gchina”) is taking over the world and must be dealt with one way or another (except that seemingly simple concepts such as tariffs, which became do-do birds to most mindful economists back in the Smoot-Hawley Act era, needed to be treated like M-80 firecrackers in the hands of a six-year-old).

Back to the age of this crowd, I am pleased to be able to have conversations that don’t necessarily start with “Kim Kardashian says…” or “Did you hear that podcast on Unblockchained Melodies”, since that takes way too much work for an aging mind. It’s also reassuring that I am not alone when we ask one another what the last name was of the guy who played James Bond after Sean Connery, but before Daniel Craig, and we all stare off into space hoping we won’t be called on by the teacher.

This is also a caring group this week since everyone has some part of their body that is either sore or damaged beyond repair and they must adjust their activities to accommodate the injury. It was tactical enough just deciding room assignments based on the number of stairs up or down to the bed and the diameter (both lateral and lengthwise) of the toilet seats. The headcount for activities last week was based on how many we could accommodate and this week its all about who is fit enough to be able to handle X hours or Y feet away from a bathroom. There are more than enough volunteers for abstaining for this or that activity. Everyone is suggesting that they will stay back and help someone else manage. This appears on the surface to be an act of kindness, but it is obvious that there is more than a little self-interest involved in the gesture.

I have recently written a piece about the age of our presidential candidates for 2020. It is clear from my comments against septuagenarian electoral appropriateness that I can and should be accused of ageism. I am somewhat unclear if a Jew can be accused of anti-semitism, an African-American can be termed a racist of anti-black persuasion, or an old guy can be accused of ageism. I like to think of myself as a pragmatist. I am happy to see older people stay productive and even accept the possibility that great inventions and deeds can come from people of any age. What I won’t agree to is that everyone of age should be expected to be able to do what everyone with youth can do. Statistically, more and more people will survive and live longer lives, but with declining health and mobility. The rate of decline clearly differs, but not to consider and realize that this is and will be a fact of advancing age is to ignore reality.

What I admire is that mental acuity is actually improved in many who see failing physicality. Those of us who can no longer or even choose no longer to run for buses, can find witty and compelling stories to tell about running for buses. This is a fair trade in my view and leads to what I call edgy ageism. The ability to be self-deprecating in a manner that brings laughter to others of age or youth is a worthwhile addition to our culture. We all need to embrace our age and be comfortable in our skin, as sagging as it may be in places.

Today we will have our first day or outing with this average sixty-year-old group of travelers. It has started out good with lots of stories and croissants. Let’s see by 4pm just how lithe and limber the group seems during the pre-prandial hours and then we can discuss whether my observations on age are relevant or just projections of my own fear of inadequacy.